The chaplain is not here to tell you that everything will be okay. 

In the long run, maybe. But we get to that "long run" faster when we're willing to be in the moment, even when it's unpleasant. 

I still think the best Biblical advice for helping people cope with loss is found in the book of Job, chapter two, verse thirteen: "They sat with him on the ground for seven days and seven nights, and no one spoke a word to him, for they saw that his suffering was very great."

Because there's nothing to say, in the moment. There's not anything to do that will make things better. 

We know that, in the long run, Job regained his possessions, new flocks, new kids... but that's not the same as everything "being okay." 

The work of the chaplain is really to let people know that they're not alone. 

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