This is an article in the form of a brief Memoir that I have written in respects to my Mother Nora Ruth Roberts who is a direct descendant of Henry James and William James.

I am open to any comments, this maybe my own soul searching on how the life of a writer can be painful, and is far from perfect. I am interested in your experience, strength and hope being that my Mother is now living in a nursing home.

“Let’s Have tea”

By Robben wainer

I am in elementary school the family is in its last turnaround. My mother picks up a stick, and says let’s find something to settle us in. With a pail on the walk we start to pluck sassafras leaves from the woods. The veins in the leaves trace the veins in my Mother’s arms, we chew on them, as we are guided through a nocturnal praise in broad day light. At home my Mother boils water and strains the sassafras leaves into a pot. We make tea, and comment on how relaxed we feel. For now there is no argument there is no war. We count the blessings we have received and give praise to Mother Nature. My mother and I hold each other like the Son and Daughters of Adam and Eve, but as calm as the chill has died down. My parents divorced in a way of keeping a balance as close friends.

I am in Junior High I am eating Mandarin Oranges and drinking Constant Comment. What does it mean to celebrate Easter and Christmas for a family that are pacifists? I am also a the victim of a pedophile my Fathers mistress flirts with me. My friends tease me that I have two Moms, my real Mother rejects me. By seventeen I am beaten from running away. I open my heart to my Mother. I tell her I was too young to discover sex at an early age, and that I was taken advantage of. My Mother forgives me, but warns me that she wants this finished in her heart. I pour out a deep affection. We forgive, we regret, but we forgive.

I am twenty three. I receive Catholic baptism. My Mother says she is thoroughly devout, and still the family is divided in this decision to carry the cross. We only accepted atheism together. We are inspired. I finally finish my first College degree with Honors. My Mother is inspired to earn her Doctorate. She does it, and to this day doesn’t know what she was able to accomplish.

Today we were brought to the cross roads. I find eternal happiness with the Society of Friends. My Mother is in a nursing home it is her turn to carry the cross. I come out of the closet. I make friends with the LGBT community. I have inherited at least this much self respect. In my heart I am back in grade school bubbling over with praise and achievement. I cannot expect my Mother to understand it all. I have been given the gift of pride. I have inherited it from her. Today is the stepping stone that I take in the wake of being apart. There is so much left for us in taking the poison toxins out of the brew. Her life is immemorial to me as a guiding spirit, showing me the way to health and prosperity, as the guiding light of Mother Nature.