No, it's not the setup for a bad joke, it's a real question. Sometimes the line between a habit and a spiritual discipline is blurry, and over the past couple of years, I've either stumbled or been led into either a discipline or a habit of keeping my head covered almost all the time. Mostly with a baseball cap (or a widebrimmed cloth or straw hat when I'm working outside in the summer--which I do a lot of, as a vegetable farmer), sometimes a bandana, occasionally a kippah (yarmulke) my Jewish wife bought me when we were in Israel together a year ago. This started when I was in college. I was growing my hair out (for the second time, having had long hair throughout my teens), and a hat was the easiest way to keep it out of my face until it got long enough to tuck behind my ears again. Plus, I was working in my college's food-service—every time I showed up to work, I had to have my hair contained, and the "culture" of my workplace encouraged hats rather than hairnets. I would work a two hour shift in the morning, and then end up wearing my hat for the rest of the day because I didn't think to take it off. After a few months, it got to where if I left my dorm room without a hat, I felt naked.

It was a small step for me from "I just don't feel right if I'm bareheaded" to "Covering my head is a spiritual practice," but as soon as I began to think of it that way, I realized I did not know how to practice it faithfully. At first I wanted to make it a way of connecting to the historical Testimony of plain dress (though I wasn't interested in going out and buying broad-brimmed black felt hats--I wanted to practice it with the hats I already wore and found practical), but I realized I didn't know how to wear a hat in a "historically Quaker" way--on a basic "dos and don'ts" level. I knew I wasn't supposed to take off my hat to the king, or to a judge... but what about in meeting for worship? Or when I entered a church as a guest? Or when my wife's grandmother asked me to take off my hat when she took us out to dinner? My fuzzy memory from the Quaker books of my childhood ("Thee, Hannah," "Benjamin West and His Cat Grimalkin," and all the Obadiah Starbuck picture books) is that 18th Century Quaker men wore their hats to dinner, and wore them to meeting, but took them off when they rose to give ministry... it seemed too complicated to learn from scratch, without a hat-wearing culture or community around me to reinforce the practice.

So I have ended up practicing my accidental discipline of head-covering in a way that is more Jewish than (traditionally) Quaker. I do it because the Jewish tradition is simple and easy to learn: Jewish men are supposed to keep their heads covered (with something) more or less from the moment they wake up until they go to bed. This is based on an understanding that covering the head shows respect for God. Another explanation is that it humbles us by providing a constant reminder that there is something above us. Both of these are reminiscent of feelings I have heard expressed by women who choose to cover. While the idea that covering the head shows respect goes against the historical basis of the testimony against hat-honor (as I understand it, early Friends accepted that doffing the hat was a sign of respect, but felt it was due only to God), I find it compelling--and appealing in the simplicity of its application: God is everywhere, so I honor God at all times by keeping my hat on (instead of having to decide when I am "in the presence of God" and should take my hat off).

I also find the Jewish perspective a refreshing break from what has always seemed to me an illogical double standard, that women honor God by covering their heads, while men honor God by uncovering them. (Although Judaism has its own double standard--lots of them, in fact.)

However, the fact remains that I am not a Jew, I am a Quaker, and I would like to find a way of understanding and practicing this "accidental discipline" that is somehow specifically Quaker. It need not be in keeping with historical Friends' practice; I would just like it to connect in my own heart and mind more clearly with my Quaker beliefs and values. I suppose I am specifically looking for other Quaker men who wear hats (either habitually or occasionally) and find it spiritually meaningful, to share their thoughts and practices (when do you keep it on? When do you take it off? When do you think about it? When doesn't it matter?). I'd also like to hear from women who cover--how does my struggle to find meaning and purpose in this practice reflect or contrast with your experience? And what about the "double standard," Friends? Does plain dress mean something entirely different for men than for women? How possible is it to have a shared conversation across those gender lines?

Okay, those are some pretty big questions--probably a bit grandiose for my first post since joining this group. Sorry, my mind is drawn to the big picutre. I'd be content with an answer to the question in the title, though. Or any other responses this brings to mind. Thanks, Friends.

Views: 715

Replies to This Discussion

My boyfriend is a broad-brim black hat kind of guy. He wears it any time he's outdoors. He wears it during Meeting, and he says wearing it at Meeting is the only time he wears it for religious reasons. He figures if he were in court he'd wear it as well, but otherwise it's an outer garment on par with a coat for him... removes it when entering a home or sitting down at a restaurant or movie theatre.

I expect some more knowledgeable than I to pipe in, but my understanding of worship protocol is to take the hat pdf while someone is ministering: it's doffed for Christ in the room. One of the signs of impending schism back in the day was that makes worshipers would keep their hat on during the vocal ministry of someone they felt to be in error.

Your post and another post in a different thread seem to have had the same issues.  Trying to reason with something that is beyond human understanding.  I cover my head because this is what the Lord wants me to do.  There is no psychology or biology involved as these sciences were created by humans.  Even the scriptures are written by people who were trying to understand the Lord and, while they are a useful tool, the bottom line is that following the Lord goes beyond human reasoning.

 

Take off your hat when you feel it is right.  Caroline

My only contribution here is to say that we humans cannot really know what it means to cover our heads. I personally DO believe it makes sense for men and women to have differences here, as well as in many other spheres. I do not agree that head covering was a human-invented observance, because at least for Christians it was carried on in their own form because of the words of Paul, which were inspired by the Holy Spirit, as is the whole Bible. So in a way you could say that God passed the instructions through Paul to us.
In support of this idea, there is a Bible translation used by the Anthroposophists that was done by Rudolf Steiner, Christian clairvoyant from the early 20th Century. He translated Paul's instructions to say that women should cover their heads to "protect their head forces," and "if a man prays or prophecies with his head covered it is a devaluation of his head forces."
The Revised Standard version says "that is why a woman ought to have a veil on her head" and continues with this mysterious phrase "because of the angels." The Steiner Bible paraphrases that as: "That is why the feminine being should care for the forming forces around her head, in order to create the right relationship to the angels."

Now no matter what you know or think of Steiner this gives food for thought. And I believe, though I don't know for sure, that the idea of head forces on the top of your head is backed up in other ancient mystical traditions along with the Third Eye. I know that I can add my own experience as a woman. When I am deeply in silent prayer I can feel a tingling on the top of my head that I believe are those forces.
I also spoke with my son-in-law about this, he is an Anthroposophist, and he said that women are more open to the spiritual world, and men more to the material. If women are bare headed they are too open to the spiritual, and it men cover their heads when praying they would be too closed from the spiritual forces they are trying to reach.

So this is way more than you were asking for, and may just muddy the waters, but it is interesting and in my mind just gives us poor mortals a hint of why God may have ordained these things, in the Bible as well as in our individual lives.

I'll be interested to see what further responses you get.

Barb

welcome to the difficult world of quaker hats, jeff.

i wear a felt broadbrim in the winter, and an amish-made straw broadbrim in the hot weather. when i worked as a cowhand, i also attached brass grommets to the straw hats so i could run a leather thong through them to hang them down my back when i chased cows or spread manure.

fishing your hat out of a cowpie or the manure spreader is good incentive to modify it somewhat for better retention on your head.

but with respect to retaining it on my head for social reasons, i don't sweat the confusion. i wear my hat most all the time, except when i pray. it's been pointed out that doing it that way was customary during some periods of quaker history. i wasn't around then, so i do it today as a way to distinguish between the forms of respect i show to god, and the forms of respect i show to people. i suppose the reason is the same now as it was then.

the key for me is this: if a human being asks me to take my hat off to eat dinner with them because they were raised that way and hats make them uncomfortable at the table, i'll generally take the hat off when i eat dinner with them. if they don't care, i'll leave it on. it's just a hat, after all.

however: if the human being wants me to take off my hat because it's a sign of deference for them or their position in society, then i keep it on my head, and they can deal with it. i won't use my hat as an acknowledgement of somebody's elevated position in human society-- i'll speak politely and treat them courteously, but i reserve taking off my hat as a sign of respect for god. it's an easy distinction, and the reasons for doing it today are exactly the same as they were 350 years ago. under god, we're all equal, all alike. all of us deserve identical respect and courtesy, but none of us deserve more than someone else because of some human status thing.

this means that i get into trouble in courtrooms, and so i try to avoid them. but in a courtroom i'm already in trouble before they notice the hat, because i won't stand up when a judge enters the courtroom either. in other social settings, i'm perfectly happy to take my hat off, so long as it won't be interpreted as an indication of the sort of social stratigraphy that weird clothing customs like that come out of.

for me the issue is why people want my hat off my head. is it for a driver's license picture? sure, i'll take it off. as part of the employee dress code for a hardware store i choose to work at? sure. when i sit in the back row of a baptist worship service? no. when i stand in front of a judge? not then either.

when you make these types of concessions for god, you will be presented with dilemmas that you didn't have to deal with before. if you're faithful to them, your measure will increase, and you will be presented with more difficult choices to make. as time goes on, you will understand more of when they are important and when they might not be. and your spiritual growth will continue.

it's just one of those things you have to do, you know. keep it as light as you can, and laugh at the absurdity with people. but the hat is a line that i won't let people cross. until that point, i don't take it too seriously.

In Thomas Clarkson's A Portraiture of Quakerism, he talks about the Quaker men only removing their hats to minister and to pray. (P. 143 in my copy.) One observation I can offer of current Quaker habit of the plain Friends in Ohio is that the men remove their hat even when someone else prays in meeting, but not when someone else offers ministry. There is sometimes a pause and then a small flurry of activity when they realize that someone is praying during worship rather than delivering ministry.

I take my hat off when I pray, or in corporate prayer (as in a meeting.) Other than that, I can't say that I feel moved one way or the other. I don't find, for instance, any value in keeping my hat on in a courtroom when I would usually take it off in a schoolroom. Neither of these carries any weight for me. I guess I tend to take my hat off indoors because I see it as outdoors wear,  just as I would take off a jacket or fold up an umbrella. Since social customs have changed so much ( no one tips their hat to a lady any more, or to someone of a higher social status), some of the old Quaker testimony regarding hat honor just no longer applies IMO.

That being said, anyone who genuinely feels called by some leading of the Spirit to wear or not wear their hat under certain circumstances would receive no criticism from me. I would only suggest that perhaps this would be a good use of a clearness committee. The first Quakers learned these things together as a community, and it behooves us to make us of the community to help move on into the world as we know it.

my own experience regarding the possibly outdated nature of the earlier friends's testimonies regarding clothing indicates to me that the original reasons often still apply, in spite of the intervening centuries.

for instance, it is still very much expected in american courtrooms to take one's hat off as a sign of social deference to a judge. if you try to keep it on, you may be ejected from the court by the bailiff or the the judge may threaten you with a citation for contempt. this is identical to the situation for which friends were legally punished in the 17th century. many social customs have changed, but this is not one of them.

should a friend choose to remove his hat in the presence of another because he feels the testimony is not important to him, then he should do as he is led. but i believe that it is important to point out that doing so reflects a change in friends's values, not a change in the reasons for the original testimony.

a simple test of the matter is to ask a few judges what their response would be should they encounter a citizen in their courtroom who refused to remove his hat (or to remain seated when the bailiff orders "everybody rise . . ." as the judge steps into the room.) some judges swing one way, others swing another.

crossing the wrong one the wrong way can be costly.

 

I have worn a plain hat for most of my adult life.  It identifies me with other plain Christians.  I never use it as an instrument of belligerence or insubordination; if other men remove (or should remove) their headgear, I remove mine.

I never wear my hat in prayer.  Since meeting for worship is in its entirety an act of prayer for me, I never wear my hat in meeting.

Incidentally, I have saved myself from many cracks on the head (on the farm) by wearing my hat; it often gives a second or two warning when I will be at risk.

RSS

Support Us

Did you know that QuakerQuaker is 100% reader supported? If you this kind of outreach and conversation is important, please support it with a monthly subscription or one-time gift.


You can also make a one-time donation or get us something from our Amazon wishlist.

Latest Activity

Jim Wilson commented on Jim Wilson's blog post 'Thoughts on a Quaker Monasticism'
"Good Morning William: I think there are a few reasons to look at monasticism as one possible model…"
1 hour ago
William F Rushby commented on Jim Wilson's blog post 'Thoughts on a Quaker Monasticism'
"Correction:  I have visited monasteries several times through the years..."
3 hours ago
Jean Yeager posted a blog post
16 hours ago
Jim Wilson liked Matt's blog post Quakers and the Doctrine of Discovery
18 hours ago
William F Rushby commented on Jim Wilson's blog post 'Thoughts on a Quaker Monasticism'
"Hello, Jim! I have visited several monasteries through the years, and appreciate their effort to…"
yesterday
Profile IconQuakerQuaker.org

A Quaker looks at assisted dying

Jill Seeger @quakerpen looks at the moral complexities around a "good death": "The question of what… See More
yesterday
Jim Wilson commented on Jim Wilson's blog post 'Thoughts on a Quaker Monasticism'
"Good Morning Anne: You make a good point.  In the works I have read from the period of…"
yesterday
Rachel Rivera liked Keith Saylor's blog post Give all things over to inward Presence ... deepen down in the midst of it all.
yesterday

© 2014   Created by QuakerQuaker.

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service