Primitive Christianity Revived, Again
Kathy, I think that what you're saying is so right, except for one thing. I think people have to find the light of God in one another BEFORE they can commit to non-violence. As long as non-violence is based on utilitarian concerns, whenever killing some people would save a larger number of people (see Libya), violence will always be a tempting, even valid, option. I think that it's only by stepping outside of our limited, rationalistic human notions of "the most good for the most people" can we truly commit to forswear violence.
It's easy to be non-violent when no one is attacking you or those you care about. Once the things you love are threatened with destruction, it's a different story. I think that only loving God MORE can keep you from responding violently. Loving God can help a person prefer martyrdom to murder; I don't know what else can.